Our Family Happenings

Let's Try This Again...

September 8, 2010.  That makes it exactly 9 months since I have lifted a finger to my little blog.  But even then it was neglected, dilapidated & in sad shape.  Here's hoping that me calling a "start over!" has the jump start effect on my motivation I'm looking for. 

Here's a recap of the last 9 months:

December 2009: We celebrated Christmas in Hong Kong with Billy, Akane & Maya, and then took of the next day for an amazing 10-day trip to Bali.

January 2010: many, many birthday parties for Abigail's friends, and the arrival of my sister, brother in law & cousin for their first Hong Kong trip ever!!

February: We welcomed the Year of the Tiger, and more visitors from the US for their first HK trip!

March: Bring on the nausea!  At 5 weeks pregnant I still sort of can't believe it, but my intense sense of smell is pretty good at convincing me that this is the real deal.

April: Depressing, horrid weather in HK continued and my volunteer duties at Abigail's school were practically full time.  Weekend get-a-way was most definitely in order and we took a trip to Cebu, Philippines.

May: I'm feeling better, have my energy back & gearing up for all the end of the school year activities that are filling our calendar, as well as starting to prep for the summer trip home to Boston.

June: Here already?  Ben, Abby, baby girl #2 & I hit the skies for our 24+ hour trip home on June 9.   Time at our place in Vermont, Rachel & Scott's wedding, a whole-family week-long trip to Martha's Vineyard were amazing highlights of June!

July: Back to VT for the 4th of July weekend festivities with the Sears/ Ambrose family, and we sold the condo!  Ben met us out in Chicago for an awesome visit with his family, and we had one completely unforgettable night at the Peter & Paul (of PP & Mary fame...) concert where Abigail made her professional singing debut on stage in front of more than 5,000 people.  And of course, the Annual Leahy Family Picnic, now 33 years in the running. 

August:  How did August sneak up on me so quickly?  When we arrived home in the US back in June, a 9 week holiday sounded never-ending, but suddenly I was looking at a 2 week countdown & trying to fit in as many last beach trips, BBQ's, playing outside time, farmer's markets, fresh ice cream, and family visit time as possible.  On the 15th we headed back to HK, to a Daddy who had missed us very much while we were away.

September:  Abigail is well into the swing of things during her second year at Canadian International School of Hong Kong (CDNIS), and we are preparing for the impending arrival of our new baby girl, to be named Charlotte Jane.  As of right now, I'm looking at 6 weeks until my induction date! 

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Wow....now that has to be a new record for me.  I wrote this post on Sept 8, 2010 as a "fresh start" and never published it. Today is December 5, 2011 and I came back to the blog thinking, "I need a do-over."  At this point does anyone have any confidence in me to follow through with that?!  Drop me a line if you think I can do--I succumb easily to peer pressure & respond well to words of encouragement!

Amazing - Volume 1

"The Trip", as it's come to be known around our house, was amazing.  It was 2000 pictures worth of amazing, and 2 total hours worth of video clips amazing.  It was amazing in the way that you just keep saying the same word over and over again because you just don't have other words for it, and silly words like spectacular, fantastic, gorgeous, and stunning just don't quite encapsulate it.  So, I'm sticking with "amazing".  Amazing people, amazing food, amazing scenery, amazing 2 year old who had not one tantrum in 3 weeks, amazing husband and wife relating and not fighting (well maybe just that one time in Arthur's Pass....), amazing road-map navigation, amazing history, amazing culture, amazing overall experience. 

It was so amazing, in fact, that I've been stumbling for months and months over how to properly share it with others to make them understand just how amazing it was.  Are you sick of that word yet?  If so you'd better stop reading here.  What you'll probably be glad to know is that you aren't going to be forced to watch hours of video of the amazing-ness of it all with my fantastically enlightening narrative in the background because of a foolish hasty error I made & wiped the handycam clean, thinking I had copied all the videos onto the hard drive, when in fact they were just aliases waiting to be burned to DVD, but I digress...

Let's start at the beginning: Singapore.

The Mer-Lion in front of the Fullerton Hotel

Abigail was perhaps most excited about this portion of the trip because it meant staying with Bailey & his family, who moved from Hong Kong back in January.  She missed Bailey quite a bit, and going to stay with him in Singapore was just more than she could bear.  And I think it's safe to say that the feeling was entirely mutual; these two will be fast friends for the rest of their lives, I think, just as their parents will be.  Ben has been to Singas several times, but like Abigail, it was my first trip.  An added element of fun was that my friend Ross from my San Francisco softball/ football/ volleyball days and his family now live in Singapore and we had plans to see them as well. 

A rare photo of me, not behind the camera!

We started out with a DuckBoat Tour, a la Boston Harbor, to get acquainted with our bearings & see a few sights.  It was a hilariously non-typical touristy thing for us to do; normal vacations for us usually include winging it and going by word of mouth from friends who have visited that place before.  Abigail thought that a boat which was painted like a duck and could drive and swim was just about the coolest thing she had ever heard of and was thus entertained during the hour long tour.  A few sights from the boat:

The Singapore Flyer & the Central Business Distric

t

Architechtural juxtaposition.. Supreme Court old & new

Marina Bay Resort Casino by Las Vegas Sands

Construction workers trying to escape the oppressive heat & humidity during lunch.

 

The Convention Center's unconventional roofline has been nicknamed "The Durian Center"

We were hungry after our big explore, and Ben wanted to bring us to a Hawker Market, famous for their "anything under the sun" food choices.  He selected Lau Pa Sat for it's proximity as well as it's fame, and there was no shortage of interesting things to look at, if not things I'd be interested in eating! 

White washed wrought iron posts inside the Hawker Market.

The architecture was gorgeous, the people friendly as can be, and in the end I chose a Japanese bento box, Ben an Indian vegeatarian option and Abigail, well, I think she ate some rice and about her weight in fresh mango.  Here are a few of the restaurants that we decided not to visit on this particular day...

(double click to open in a new window for proper appreciation of the menu choices...)

Hard to believe, but this only brought us into the early afternoon.  We decided to push our luck with our already pretty tired two year old, and head out to the famous Singapore Zoo.  Once we arrived we realized what a fantastic decision this was-- the Singapore Zoo was amazing!!  (I did warn you about the recurrence of that word...)  One of the zoo's claims to fame is the open-air feeling of it as you walk through.  This was indeed true and evident right from the start; we felt like we were part of the animals habitats, and the lack of visible fencing or enclosures was astonishing.  Practically as soon as you enter there are monkeys swinging overhead, 

and then to be 30 feet from a massive rhino but be completely safe and have no discernible walls or fences between you was a complete departure from any zoo I have ever visited before. And FYI, this photo was not taken with any sort of zoom lens...

This was the beginning of Abigail's mantra for the rest of the day: "I smell something stinky..."

I was a picture taking fool for the rest of the day, but you all know what zebras, orangutans & giraffes look like so I'll spare you posting them all here....but if you want to see our full zoo experience you can check it out in our album. 

Of course the animals were incredible, but there is only so much ooh-ing and ahh-ing a kid Abby's age is willing or capable of, especially in the extraordinary heat of Singapore.  Which is why I credit the zoo with being brilliant, and making the Kid's Zone water park as part of the zoo!!  No extra admission, no tickets...something for kids of all ages, literally.  We learned our lesson to bring bathing suits & towels for next time, but this was a highlight of the day.

 

Oh, and I have to include my favorite sign of the day, cleverly posted in front of the only animal enclosure with obvious glass & fences: the lions.

Phew!  That was more than enough for one day, and we were thrilled to get back to the Egan's comfy flat to enjoy their wonderful company as well as enjoy Tim's culinary skills on the grill with some nice cold Australian wine.  Tomorrow we'll tackle Clarke Quay, Little India, and a fantastic local dinner.

Now Where Was I...?

Oh yes, I remember.  It was early May & we had just returned to Hong Kong after 3 weeks of exploring Singapore, Sydney & New Zealand.  I can look back to that period as when my day by day photo project fell by the wayside, and my blogging, well, to say got put on the back burner would be far to generous an allocation....it was plain forgotten. 

May was a swirl of me not feeling up to par, which was apparently warranted as I spent a week in the hospital for asthma with both of my lungs partially collapsed.  Ben's mom was visiting during that time frame as well, and I was released just in time to be home with Abigail & the family for her 3rd birthday party, even though we had to cancel her party (twice...but that's another story all together).  June brought with it moving, unpacking, and re-packing for our 8 weeks in the US, and a lot more.  I'm going to try to do a month-by-month summary to get up to date; the thought of closing out the year without updating here seems just unfathomable to me & my desire, er, compulsive requirement, of organizing & sorting out at year end.

The good news is that a lot of you have received our Christmas card, and that's what has brought you to our page.  I vacillated on whether or not I should include the link on the card, but in the end I decided to because I thought it would be a great motivator for me to catch up!   So here is my year-end resolution to myself: a summary of June - December, and pictures to accompany.  I'm going to let go of my overwhelming urge to crop, color correct or photoshop every image, and just share what I've got as it is.  Hope you check back by New Year's Eve to see if I've met my goal!

Wishing you all the best of holiday seasons,

~Amy for all 3

Forever and a Day

The Esplanade Performing Arts Center, Singapore

 

Hangin' around in Sydney

Fond of Ferns in New Zealand

Welcome back to me!  It has been a painfully long time since I've posted an entry here, and quite frankly I've missed it!  It's not that I haven't been thinking of posting, it's just that stuff keeps getting in my way.  Like me.  Not to make excuses for myself, but just to explain: We were away for almost 3 weeks....and I have been searching night & day for a new apartment, since our last day in this one is June 7.  Add to that my inability to multi-task as of late, and what you get is my pictures, as well as my thoughts, being a bit scattered.  Lots of things started & none finished.  Ugh.  Speaking of organization, that makes me think of my closets, cupboards, and dressers, which are also a bit on the disarrayed side right now....and I'll have to sort them out too, as we prepare to move.  And Ben's mom is coming to visit at the end of May (yea!!!), right before Abby turns 3...which also means birthday party planning is in my future.  So you can see, busy. 

I'll be back soon, with pictures, some video & anecdotes about our big Singapore- Sydney - New Zealand trip, and in the meantime I ask for your patience, knowing that I'm working on it!  

Tales from the Tub

I love the conversations that Abby has with her toys when she doesn't know anyone is listening.  There was a very serious conversation tonight in the tub between spotted cow & orange horse.  It went a little something (or, exactly verbatim...) like this:

The Scene: Spotted Cow in right hand, Orange Horse in left, nose to nose

Spotted Cow: "Orange Horse, you want to play a game with me?"
Orange Horse: "Okay, we can play together."
Spotted Cow: "I love to play hide and seek games."
Orange Horse: "Oh, by the way, speaking of games, I know another good one.  It's called splashing."

At this point, both cow & orange horse got plunged repeatedly under the water, and no pictures were captured of the melee, since I had to flee to dry ground to protect the camera.

Kung Hei Fat Choy!

Welcome to the Year of the Ox!

I realize that I am extremely delinquent in getting my Chinese New Year celebration pictures posted, but  I refer back to my own theme for the year: better late than never.  This was our second time experiencing Lunar New Year festivities in Hong Kong, and I'm proud to say that I've learned a thing or two about them since last time.  Here's the short list:

1. I learned that all businesses close for everything for almost a full 10 days.  I got my "to do" list done before the first day & saved myself a lot of headache that was really frustrating last year. 
2. I learned the difference between the lion and the dragon in the dances.  Call me a stupid American, but last year I was really confused between the big dragon (which really is a dragon...) and the little dragons (which are actually lions...).  That is all cleared up now....see below.
3. I learned that there really is something to the whole idea of starting the New Year out fresh.  Not just by making resolutions and turning a page on a calendar, but by literally sweeping the old year out the house & making everything fresh & ready to welcome the new year in.

Dragon Dance from Amy Happ on Vimeo.

We watched the traditional dragon & lion dance downstairs at our apartment complex; the crowd was full of adorable mostly Caucasion kids wearing classic Chinese cheongsam dresses,  covering their ears from the loud drums.   I'm slightly embarrassed to admit that the bulk of my learning about Chinese New Year has been from Abby's books on the subject.  She has a couple of very cute pop-up & lift-the-flap books that do a nice job explaining. 

I'll give you my mini-tutorial.  The lions: they are smaller than the dragon & consist of 2 people in the costume.  The acrobatics of the lion dancers are both amazing and terrifying.  You saw the video above?  It's a lion dancer (only one of the 2 person pair) dancing on top of that tall pole.  Not only do they balance & dance at great heights, but they also do a  variation where they jump from pedestals ranging from 4-6 feet high.  Keep in mind that there is one person in the back, holding onto the waist of the lead dancer, who is maneuvering the lion head, balancing, and jumping. 

The picture to the left was taken about a week later, at Ben's office.  The head of the lion jumps, supported only by the dancer in the back, and lands safely on those barely-foot-sized pedstals.  The reason for the lion's presence at the celebration is to scare away the bad luck of last year.  They blink their eyes & open & close their mouth mouths and jump around to make sure that no bad spirits or luck from the past year are lingering for the arrival of the new year, which happens when the Dragon opens his eyes.  The dance moves so quickly and with such precision that it is just breath taking.  Unfortunately the indoor version was prohibitively loud, and Abby & I had to leave before the big finale.  (I also want to add a disclaimer that my pictures from the indoor event are disappointing to me because I had Abby clinging to my neck because of the noise, and I was taking pictures one handed...with a camera that isn't just a point-n-shoot.)

Now for the dragon part of the dance: When the dragon opens its eyes then the new year has arrived.  The dragon brings all the good luck that will follow for the new year, and therefore must visit and bless businesses to ensure their coming prosperity.  The dragon costume has to be handled by a big team of people as it is threaded in a tight spiral pattern while the whole team runs.  More on the history dragon dance here.

 

The dragon dance team runs in to start the performance.

The dragon is flanked by 4 lions.  Given the mess of the financial markets & that this performance is taking place at Ben's work building, the more lions the better!  Maybe there should have been 2 dragons, too?

The lions entering.  I still can't imagine how the person in the rear runs so adeptly all bent in half.

 

Up close & personal with our dragon.

So here we are in the Year of the Ox.  Wishing you all health, wealth & prosperity!   And if you'd like to see even more pictures from our day, you can see them here.

 

So, Are You On Facebook?

It's a phenomenon.  It's addictive.  It's polarizing. I could go on and on.  But I won't, because "The Merits of Facebook" is too big of a topic for my little blog.  I don't want to engage in conspiracy theory on whether or not FB is actually a governmental agency designed to keep tabs; I don't want to waste my time (or yours) discussing the myriad applications and why they're awesome or ridiculous.   I'm going to just accept Facebook as I use it: an absolutely amazing medium for connecting with people.  And word games.  Those are pretty great, too. 

Recently, as many of you are already aware, there has been a Facebook "Note" circulating, much like a chain letter, except better because you don't have to spend any money on postage.   It's called "25 Random Things About Me".  If you haven't heard of it, please let me be the one to introduce you to the concept.  It's pretty complicated, so read carefully.  You make a list of 25 random things about yourself.   Got that? 

Facts, likes, dislikes, habits, fears, dreams, accomplishments, defeats, regrets, traditions, beliefs, and memories are all fair game.  It's actually harder than it sounds; at least it was for me.  Here's where I ran into trouble.  I wanted to be selective about what I chose to represent myself while simultaneously trying to cover as many aspects of who I am as possible.  I had a hard time being thoughtful & honest without also feeling really vulnerable and exposed.  I mean, I have a lot of "friends" on FB, but a lot of them are people I'm friendly with, but to whom I wouldn't necessarily tell a bunch of random personal stuff.

And then there are the funny lists, like my brother Billy, who managed to write a list that is true, but also hilariously funny & dripping with his dry wit.  (For those of you who know my brother, I"m sure that this description of his talents comes as somewhat of a surprise.  Riiight.)  After reading Billy's and a few others on the funny side, I started wondering if maybe I was overthinking the whole process, and should have taken a more light-hearted approach.  After all, how seriously do I take myself? 

I decided that changing it was completely silly and a big waste of time and that my original list should stand as it is.  So here you go:

25 Random Things About Me

1.)My daughter & I have the same monogram, ALH.

 

Jewelry box from Kim & BB

2.)My hair is naturally curly &  when I wear it straight I feel like a whole different person....prettier & more sassy.

3.)I've only skydived once but I want to do it over & over...and fall faster & further from higher each time.  However, I feel like going again would be irresponsible now that I'm a mom.  (Adding to my original note, my sister Kim also had our skydiving adventure on her "25 Things" list.  To borrow from hers, she rightly noted that it was probably a good thing we jumped, becuase the plane that brought us up was mostly duct-taped together on the inside & we're not sure it would have made it back down safely!)

 

Skydive in Paradise, CA

4.)I want to go back to school to get a Ph.D.  As much as I love being a full time stay at home mom, I miss using my brain in a professional way.

5.)I love wrapping and giving gifts. I think that even the simplest little gift is so much more memorable & fun to open with really pretty wrapping paper & ribbon.

 

The Happ Girl's Christmas Gifts

6.)My life changed dramatically when I started practicing yoga regularly.  There really is truth in that whole mind-body-spirit connection.

7.)I'm a control freak.  Some stuff I can let slide, but other stuff....I just can't help myself.  I am aware that this trait can make me overbearing sometimes.  I'm working on it.  See #6.

8.)I absolutely cannot fall asleep with wet hair.

9.)I want to learn how to play the guitar and the piano.

10.)My mom has made me angel food cake with fresh strawberries & homemade whipped cream for my birthday every year since I was at least 12.

When you have kids, sometimes they get the first piece of cake even

when it's your birthday....but you don't really care. 

Also, Abby told us that she'd eat her strawberries "tomorrow".

11.)My favorite day of the year is the last Saturday in July; it's our family reunion for my mom's side of the family.  As many aunts, uncles & cousins (and 1st cousins once removed....) come as humanly possible.  It's a tradition 32 years in the running.

 

Just a handful of those first cousins once removed.

12.)While I'm a New England girl at heart, I found out most about who I am as a person while living in San Francisco.

13.)My best friends live in MA, CT, GA, & CA...which is really inconvenient since I live in HK.  Thank God for Skype, Facebook & gmail chat.  :-)

14.)I love sewing, quilting, cross-stitch, & knitting.  While I don't consider myself a terribly creative person, I do like to create things.  These mediums help me accomplish just that.

    

The mirror image quilts I made for Morgan & Paige.

15.)I'm really good at fixing stuff.  And using power tools.  And putting things together.  These could be separate items, but that feels a little like cheating.  Feel free to inquire about my rates & schedule availability for your area.  I do travel.

16.)I like baking more than cooking.  Banana bread, chocolate chip cookies & apple pie are the highlights of my repetoire.

17.)My favorite part of the day is rocking Abby in her chair after bedtime stories are done & the light is turned out.

18.)I've lived in 10 different towns/ cities in my life...Concord, MA; Amherst, MA; Norfolk, VA; San Francisco, CA; Oakland, CA; New York, NY; Warren, VT; Stamford, CT; Darien, CT; Hong Kong.

 

Our house in Darien.  Gosh I miss grass.

19.)I would be thrilled if I could survive solely on grapes, watermelon, mango & strawberries for the rest of my life.

20.)I don't believe in complaining.  Sure, things stink sometimes, but if a.)they've already happened & you can't time travel to change them or b.)were something that you couldn't have controlled to begin with, there is really just no point complaining about them.  Accept it, make the best of it and move on already!

21.)I need at least one hour of time totally to myself everyday.  Sometimes this means ignoring Ben for an hour after Abby is in bed if I haven't been able to get that time during the day.  Lucky for me he knows this and is very accepting & understanding of this part of my personality.

22.)Moving to Hong Kong was really hard for me.  I absolutely hate being so far away from family back home, but I'm really grateful that Billy & Akane live here so I can reconnect with them in a more meaningful way and have Abby develop a relationship with them too.

 

Christmas 2008

23.)Related to #22, I have a hard time making friends.  By that I mean going beyond the acquaintances stage of friendship to the place where you really trust & can talk openly with someone.  But I find that the friendships last a really, really long time once those connections are made.

 

Alli, Perk, me & Kief on Perk's wedding-eve. 

(BTW to all my other friends: choosing just 1 picture for this item was really tough!)

24.)One of the things I miss the most about living in San Francisco is playing football & softball (and volleyball & field hockey & floor hockey...) several days a week.

 

Team Old School continues their reign in the Golden Gate Sport & Social Club football championship.  (I'm the one holding the shirt.)

25.)Someday I will run a marathon.

So....what would you put on your list?

2,180

Abigail has been fighting a cold for about a week now; the sniffles, the chestier-every-day cough, the general "ugh" feeling.  Today when I picked her up from school she was a little warm, so the "er duo beep-beep" was employed, and sure enough, she has a low grade fever.  What, you don't know what an er duo beep-beep is?!  Its the name Abby has bestowed upon our ear scan thermometer; 'er duo' is pronounced 'AR dwoh' and is the Mandarin word for ear ( 耳朵 ), and beep-beep, well, it beeps twice as you're using it.  Naturally.

Despite the fact that she hasn't been napping regularly for a few weeks now, it was evident that this droopy little lump of a girl needed a rest, so off to the rocking chair we went.  This chair is my favorite piece of furniture in the house, and the one item that I would not even consider leaving in Connecticut when we moved here.  Many, many, many hours have been spent in that chair.

Five days old

There is a routine in the chair.  First, you need to have Scratchy.  That's the giraffe-looking blankie that is her best pal & lovie (Thanks again, Brenda!).  Then, there has to be a cozy (a.k.a., blanket)...but it has to be the right cozy; lately the cozy of choice has been the quilt I made her before she was born, pictured here.  Third, a book.  Goodnight Moon usually works, as does anything by Dr. Seuss, or Jamberry by Bruce Deegan.  And finally, a song.  Today Abby said, "Sing me another one, Mama" three times after I sang the standard Laurie Bernker Band "Moon, Moon, Moon."   So, that brought me to my old stand-by, "The One Who Knows" by Dar Williams.



I've been singing this song to her almost every time I've put her down for a nap or to bed for the night since the day she was born.   Add in all the other random middle of the night wake ups, and the first four months that she screamed anytime she went anywhere near her carseat (which used to make the 5 hour drives to Vermont really, really fun....), and I figure that I must've sung this song about 2,180 times so far.  Given that, Abby knows all the words now, and was half-singing, half-humming along with this afternoon's serenade until the 3rd verse, when I could just feel the sleep overwhelm her, as her tired little body just sank more heavily into me.  I finished the song anyway, and kept rocking with her for a few more minutes before making the transition to her crib.  Its been a  long time since Abby  has fallen asleep on me, and I was relishing the quiet, the peace, the reliance on me.   To this day there are times when I'm singing it and I get choked up.  I'll happily sing that song 2,180 times more...and then some.

(P.S.- This is also the song that Ben danced to with his mom at our wedding.)

What you said, Mama?

It's no secret that my kid is the smartest, funniest, cutest kid on earth.  Just like your kid is, of course.  Any one of the Kids Say the Darndest Things books, dvds or emails will confirm it.  Our kids are hilarious little creatures who imitate us, and sometimes pick up on the more adult parts of our speech.  Those times are the funniest, in my opinion.  Abby has been on a real tear over the last week in this regard, coming up with a few absolutely great ones.

1.)We were getting ready to leave the house yesterday to go meet Uncle Billy at the park.  I called for Abby to come out of the bedroom to put her shoes on.  She hollered back to me, in her sing-song little voice, "Mama, I will be there in just one moment."

Abby & Uncle Billy successfully wrestle a crocodile.

2.)In an effort to teach Abby good manners, we began teaching her not to talk with food in her mouth from an early age.  This has turned on us, and we've created an etiquette mini-monster, quite often admonishing Ben or myself, "don't talk with food in your mouth" (even when we aren't), with a mouth full herself.  I think she's well on her way to understanding the whole concept of "do as I say, not as I do"...

3.)Ben was trying to give me a few minutes of peace and quiet on Saturday morning, and therefore attempting to lure Abby out of the house and down to the coffee shop.  In her room, Abby sitting on the footstool of her rocking chair, he proposed the plan (which included mango juice and a mini-blueberry muffin for incentive, mind you...), and was met with the following response.  Arms crossed over her chest, Abby declared, "No thank you, Daddy, I would not enjoy that."  Instead, this is the scene that followed:

Time by myself, or me, Abby, Milo & a book?  Both are so good for such different reasons!

4.)A few days ago Abby came into the kitchen while I was prepping her dinner and exclaimed, "Mama, I am starving!  I told her not to worry, that dinner was on it's way.  Her reply?  "Oh, thank you Mama.  I'm so pleased to hear that!"  Seriously?!  She's 2-1/2!!

5.)This last example is probably one of our most commonly heard "Abby-isms".  Quite often Abby will ask us, "what we are doing today?" or "where we are going today?" as soon as we enter her room in the morning.  I know that many times I use that phrase, "Here's the plan:___" to layout what's to come.  Abby has adopted it as her own, and if she isn't totally cool with whatever has been proposed we're hit with either "that plan is not great for me", or "I don't like that plan."  Hard to argue with her when she throws those down....especially when she usually also proposes a counter offer.

Writing these all down together it occurs to me how much time I spend trying to convince Abby to do things...sometimes trying even to make them seem like they are her idea!

Just out of curiosity, does anyone else have a toddler who has super-sonic hearing?  Abby apparently possesses this ability.  No little mutter or under-the-breath thinking out loud remark goes unnoticed by my little eagle eared cutie.  A prompt, "What you said, Mama?" always follows, and then is immediately followed up by, "why you said, _____ (whatever I just told her I said)?"  Which means I end up spending a lot of time explaining myself.  She keeps me on my toes, at least. 

And of course, I can't discount how sweet the sound of her little voice is as well.  Here is a video of Abby singing "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" from Cinderella, so you can enjoy that little voice, too.

Cinderella Song from Amy Happ on Vimeo.

"You Say Goodbye, and I Say Hello"

On Sunday night we received a piece of incredibly sad news from Ben's mom.  Her older brother, Greg, died the night before of a massive heart attack at age 59. I think that our reactions were fairly typical of what most people go through at a time like that.  They ran the gamut from shock & sorrow, disbelief & sympathy, to concern & anger. 

Benjamin boarded a plane on Tuesday to be with his family, to offer his love and support for his mom, Marissa, who has now said goodbye to both parents and her only sibling.  To his dad, Bob, as he finds ways to cope with this loss himself, all the while providing Marissa what she needs to make it through.  To his Aunt Bonnie, who besides losing her life partner & spouse, is now faced with the challenge of raising 2 teenage boys.  To his cousins, Jared (14), who wrongly feels some weight of responsibility for his dad's passing; and Alex (16) whose very special place in life in some ways may shelter him from the depth of his own grief, but in other ways may prevent him from ever fully understanding why his dad went away.

For as long as I've known Ben & his family (which is going on 15 years now...), I have been continuously awed by his mom's ability to come at situations from a place of hope, love, and upside.  I know that a great deal of her perspective is derived from her deep faith in God and her relationship with Him.  I would guess that some of it comes from successfully raising 5 children who are all gorgeously kind, compassionate, creative, curious, intelligent, loving people.  But I think that the well-spring of that attitude, that silver-lining-finding ability, comes from the security and love of the childhood home that she shared with 2 amazing parents and her brother Greg.  

February 1959

Greg, Lois, Cholm & Marissa Hougton, circa 1971

From Hong Kong I've tried to offer thoughts, prayers, karma, good will...whatever it may be that will travel the 8,500 miles around the globe to let all of those people know how much I am with them too.  As part of that effort, I've had a few email exchanges with Marissa.  When her response to my at-best clumsily worded attempt at condolences arrived in my inbox, I read it and sat for several minutes in silence with tears streaming down my cheeks. 

In awe, I allowed my gaze to run over the words she had written over and over again, letting them seep in & trying...trying...to understand how it is that she can be thinking these things now, in, as I imagine it to be, a dark hour of pain & suffering.  She had done it again; she had found a way to pick up a thread of hope amidst this tragedy, and she was sharing it with me. 

I will keep her words in confidence, but felt compelled to share what is to me, the moral.  It is fairly simple, certainly not a revelation of sorts, but rather an excellent 3-fold reminder. 

1. Our time here amongst our loved ones is brief; we should conscientiously & deliberately make the most of it. 

2. The "go-to" rules of love & forgiveness always apply, and should be doled out generously.
3. Every situation can have hope & light if you step back & look for that change of perspective.

Wishing you all fresh perspectives on your days.
With love,
~Amy

For more on Greg, please read on.